Recursive Process
My revision process in this course was much more substantial than it has been in previous courses. When revising my Discourse essay, I did my best to improve the flow and organization of the paper, while trying to explain and support my claim more clearly and concisely. The first thing I did when editing the first draft was to add a new body paragraph. I split the third body paragraph of my first draft and made it into two body paragraphs, which allowed me to isolate two ideas from each other and make my points more clearly defined. Instead of one giant paragraph exploring conflicts between Discourses and the importance of metaknowledge, each claim got its own paragraph. This improved the organization of the paper and allowed me to elaborate more on those ideas.
I also edited my introduction and wrote a conclusion while working on my final draft. Instead of simply introducing all the texts in my introduction, I started to formulate my opinion and state exactly where I stand in the conversation between the authors. In the first draft, I simply stated, “Unlike Gee, Delpit thinks Discourses can be directly taught, and that claiming anything else is oppressive to women and people of color (545). ” In my final draft, I wrote, “I agree with Gee that actively participating in a Discourse is the only way to enter said Discourse, but I think school is a perfect place to be introduced to dominant Discourses,” which effectively puts me into the conversation. My addition of a conclusion wraps up the essay and summarizes all the main points in one place and ends with me describing the potential consequences of failing to master a primary discourse. I finish my essay by stating “Without this exposure to dominant Discourses, social mobility would be near impossible.”
